There is more, and I ache for it.
There is a sort of longing, a desperation and nostalgia, that has been part of me for as long as I can remember. I think I would feel incomplete without it, even in my moments of purest joy. I struggle to put words to it; perhaps that is why I have journaled and written and blogged for so many years... perhaps that is why I named this blog the closest all-encompassing word that I could find: the German noun sehnsucht. Even this translates clumsily to English, but C. S. Lewis may have put it best -
"An inconsolable longing of the heart for we know not what."
As Lewis said, I couldn't tell you exactly what object or end I yearn for. But I can begin now to taste the general scope of it - to recognize the bits of it that are loneliness for a Friend I've never seen, homesickness for a Place I've never been, and a general dissatisfaction with the incompleteness of this temporary earthly life.
Hi, I'm Hallie
I'm a quiet person, but I could talk about the Bible all day. I'm a shameless homebody, but I would get on a plane back to Israel tomorrow if I could. I feel like a six-year-old child and a 100-year-old soul wrapped into one, looking at the world with the nostalgia and sobriety of age as well as the wonder and imagination of youth.